NochNoch.com

控制的反面

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如果你想學習如何放棄控制,那就去照顧一個嬰兒吧。

 

我的女兒一個月前出生。除了要體驗激素的上下起伏、情緒的急劇變化,受攪擾的睡眠,擁有一個嬰兒還迫使我完全將自己的行為聽由別人指揮。

 

你根本無法控制一個嬰兒。需要人喂的時候她會哭,餓的時候她就要吃,她想醒著就一直不會睡,而當她想睡的時候即便你不停地戳她的小臉也休想把她弄醒。

 

計畫早被拋到九霄雲外,日程安排改了又改。多虧了丈夫的支持和我們那套在需要的時候能夠得到幫助的應急系統,我設法保留了一些約好的事情。另外,儘管處於調整到過渡階段的適應期,我們還是儘量去保留某種“品質生活”。成為一位健康快樂的母親和保持健康的婚姻對這個小麻煩鬼的幸福同樣也很重要。因此,如果修剪一次指甲能夠讓我保持頭腦清醒冷靜,我會讓別人來照顧孩子而自己去做指甲。稍微休息一下,出去赴個晚宴或者跟丈夫一起出去遛狗會讓我疲憊的身心清爽一新。

 

像我這樣的控制狂,圍著別人轉而不知道下一步做什麼會變得極度焦慮。該如何應對呢?不知道。

 

但毫無疑問,這個寶貝迫使我做出了至今為止行為上的最大改變。Timmie教我放鬆的理念,而我們的孩子會強迫我將其付諸實施。

 

有些事情就是會脫離我們的控制。隨它去吧。那只是一種經歷。

 

about Noch Noch

Enoch Li, (pen name: Noch Noch) was born and raised in Hong Kong and Australia. She has also studied / worked / lived in the US, France, UK, Japan, The Netherlands, China, and has travelled to more than 40 countries. She loves travelling and her curiosity in foreign cultures and languages has led her to enjoy her life as an international executive in the banking & finance industry. However, she was forced to take time off work in 2010 due to her illnesses and after spending time in recovery, cooking, practising Chinese calligraphy, reading and writing – in short, learning to take care of herself and letting out the residual work stress, she has transitioned into a Social Entrepreneur and founded BEARAPY to help corporates make workplaces mentally healthy, and support executives to become more resilient.